Supermom, superwoman, doer of all things … whatever you call it, my exhausted mom friend had simply had enough.
Sometimes moms pour so much energy into making life perfect for everyone else that they fall through the cracks. Supermom is not immune to mom burnout.
My friend was the picture of busy: working part-time, helping her children at home, serving as room mom for her child’s fifth-grade class, volunteering in preschool for her son, tutoring in elementary school for her daughter, and driving kids to soccer and dance. She cooked a great meal every night, kept a tidy house, and still made time for weekend dates with her husband.
Her family meant everything to her, yet she felt pressured to be everything at once: stay-at-home mom, working mom, and the perfect social-media mom. The problem was simple—she didn’t have the time. Her quality time with family was suffering, and so was she. She called often, made time for friends, and seemed unstoppable.
Perfection… right?
The Overwhelmed Mom
One afternoon we went to the park with our children and her new baby. She asked if she could share something with me, and we sat together while the children played. That’s when I noticed the tears. She reached for my hand, and I could feel her stress.
“I can’t do it anymore. I am burnt out. I’m tired. I don’t even know if it’s worth it. I’ve lost my joy. I feel like I’m asleep after 15 minutes on the job.”
She was ready to take off her cape and just be mom. She wanted to stop juggling roles—supermom, room mom, carpool mom—and focus on being present for her children.
There wasn’t a single moment that caused it; the exhaustion crept in slowly. She still woke with the baby, helped her older kids, supported friends—she was doing it all.
“I just started to lose my joy with every carpool, every night-time feeding, every workday, every request.”
Her days had become a rapid-fire list of demands:
“Time to head to soccer!”
“Did everyone get their lunches?”
“Where is my other shoe?”
“I need to change the baby.”
“Do you have my bow?”
“Can Jake eat over for dinner?”
“Can Katie go with us to the movies?”
“Did you make dinner yet?”
“Can we have a snack?”
“Can you get me a glass of milk?”
“The baby is awake, mom. It is waking me up.”
When Supermom Faces Burnout
“In the middle of all of it, I just lost my joy,” she told me. “I wanted to do everything 100%, and because of that I got burnt out. I kept adding more to my plate because I knew I could handle it, but I didn’t think about how I would handle it.”
Mom burnout is real, and it can leave you feeling overwhelmed, depleted, and anxious. Balancing the roles of full-time mom, partner, employee, and caregiver is heavy work.
We talked and realized that doing too much for everyone left too little for her and her family. Overwhelm turned into anxiety as pressure mounted. She is not alone—many adults experience anxiety while juggling multiple responsibilities with little time for themselves.
We discussed practical steps she could take, and she began making changes that helped.
How to Stop Trying to Be Supermom
Seek help. Therapy can be invaluable. A mental health professional can offer perspective, coping strategies, and tools you might not have considered. Counseling can help you prioritize what matters most and let go of what doesn’t. If you feel overwhelmed, talking with a licensed marriage and family therapist or another mental health professional can be a strong first step.
Finding help can be hard—many areas have shortages of mental health providers, and regular appointments take time. Still, even small steps toward support can make a difference.
My friend made several practical changes that reduced daily stress:
- She involved her family in planning and household tasks.
- She started ordering groceries online to save time.
- She cooks three crock-pot meals a week and keeps other dinners simple.
- The whole family cleans together.
- She volunteers in the classroom only once a month instead of weekly.
- Her kids are limited to one sport per season to reduce scheduling pressure.
- She and her husband go out for breakfast once a week instead of an elaborate date night, using a volunteering day to create time together.
- She put the kids to bed 20 minutes earlier on a consistent Monday–Friday schedule and uses that quiet time to read a novel and decompress.
Inspiration for the Recovering Supermom
Stress can feel like a heavy weight, but reframing how you approach tasks helps. A few quotes that resonated with her:
“One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from a horse master. He told me to go slow to go fast. I think that applies to everything in life. We live as though there aren’t enough hours in the day, but if we do each thing calmly and carefully, we will get it done quicker and with much less stress.” — Viggo Mortensen
“Much of the stress that people feel doesn’t come from having too much to do. It comes from not finishing what they’ve started.” — David Allen
“We can easily manage if we only take each day, the burden appointed to it. But the load will be too heavy for us if we carry yesterday’s burden over again today, and then add the burden of the morrow before we are required to bear it.” — Unknown
Today, take your day and do what you can. Then stop and look at the little faces that look up at you. Smile and enjoy them. They will remember how you listened, played, and loved them more than how many events you attended or meals you cooked.
Fast forward three months: my friend is refreshed and renewed. She adopted the mindset of loving those she loves and not sweating the small stuff.
You can’t do it all. No one can. But you can choose to do some things well and take care of both your family and yourself.
Don’t be SUPERmom… just be THEIR mom. It is worth it.
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